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  • Peace Talks: Finding Peace In and Out of Prison
    needle in his arm all alone in a room That s the way he dealt with it with a suicide drug overdose For me I m learning how to live By learning how to live it s about spiritual principles Spiritual principles are about having honesty having forgiveness I think forgiveness is the biggest thing we can have in our lives Forgiveness is not only about me forgiving you It s about hoping you might forgive me And in turn the greatest gift I get is I m able to forgive myself That s the key to transformation forgiveness As far as someone else changing that code of conduct that s not going to happen today I won t allow it to happen BOSS What advice would you have for others who find themselves in perhaps a similar place Not everyone has those moments of transformation Not everyone is immediately committed to turning themselves around But what advice would you have CHRIS It s a really good question If you re talking about someone coming out of prison I would recommend that you find a halfway house I can only speak from my experiences I m not from New Mexico I didn t know anybody in New Mexico At the halfway house I went to I started out with a roommate Then I got my own room They gave me food they gave me shelter It was imperative to have that in my life When you re struggling and you don t even have a place to go your chances of success go down huge When you re hungry your chances go down huge By having that opportunity it created freedom You start to have privacy There s no privacy in an institution You start to cherish that You want to find some more freedom Most men and women who get out of prison their first thought is I want to go back The introduction back into society is very overwhelming When you re carrying a felony record like mine my first job interview we had a great dialogue I was telling her I did ten million a year with a company and so on She said what did you go to prison for I said conspiracy to commit armed robbery with a deadly weapon She said it s been a really nice interview I m going to get back to you we really want to hire you I knew the interview was over But I had a place to go I had dinner that night I had people from the community come in and serve me food I had a meeting to go to I had Community Corrections which was paying my rent So all of that stress wasn t sitting in front of me and I was able to think ok tomorrow will be a better day BOSS Alisha why don t you talk about some of the advice you got from counselors that was really important to

    Original URL path: http://www.goodradioshows.org/peaceTalksL42.html (2016-02-13)
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  • Good Radio Shows: 2007 Episodes

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    Original URL path: /peaceTalksL55.htm (2016-02-13)


  • PEACE TALKS: Nonviolent Communication with Marshall Rosenberg
    our needs are I went to schools for twenty one years Not only was I never asked what I was feeling I certainly was never asked what my needs were KRYDER Give us a list of maybe the top five or seven generic human needs ROSENBERG Let me give you all nine of them because according to the Chilean economist Manfred Max Neef we only have about nine needs Needs are very important to Max Neef because his whole economic system is based on human needs How do we measure them so we really gauge our economy its success on the meeting of human needs and not the tragic way we have been measuring it The first one he calls sustenance food shelter and water the basic physical needs Next safety protection Next love Next understanding Next community Next recreation play rest he lumps those as one Then one of the most important needs of all autonomy Look in the newspaper on any given day and see how many wars are going on over that need Human beings have a strong need to be in charge of their own lives to not have somebody claiming to know what they have to do or should do Anybody who says that to them it threatens his or her autonomy You see all the wars going on between nations Listen in on any family with children You will hear autonomy wars It s time to go wash up for bed No I don t wanna Did you hear me No See An autonomy war Another need creativity Then according to Victor Frankl probably the most important need of all a need for meaning purpose in life How sad how few people on the planet are getting that need met They are educated to misrepresent needs according to Michael Lerner We have been educated to misrepresent our needs We have been educated to think we have a need to consume a need for money a need for status not realizing those are not needs INGLES It is hard to overcome what I call common interchanges in speech You talk it in one area of your book We tend to want to jump in with advice We want to say you know that happened to me once and start telling a story It seems so common to offer advice because you think people are asking for it ROSENBERG Yes My children really gave me a good lesson on this They taught me never to give them advice unless I received a request in writing signed by a lawyer audience laughter It is not easy When somebody says something especially if what they re saying is something we don t believe or agree with we want to jump in and correct them or we want to defend ourselves all of which is not the best way to connect with that person We show as hard as it is how to take a deep breath and if

    Original URL path: http://www.goodradioshows.org/peaceTalksL36.html (2016-02-13)
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  • Good Radio Shows: 2012 Episodes

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    Original URL path: /peaceTalksL107.htm (2016-02-13)


  • Good Radio Shows: 2007 Episodes

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    Original URL path: /peaceTalksL47.htm (2016-02-13)


  • Peace Talks
    between a reasonable kind of fear where we need to back off from a charging bull and the kind of future that doesn t exist Just one little example years ago I was doing some deep therapeutic work I was working with some severe trauma that I d had as a child As a result of doing that work terror actually came up and not just in the therapeutic situation I was driving to work one day and I was experiencing terror my hair was standing straight up there were these waves of energy going through my body a very intense experience My mind happened to be strong at that moment and so I knew it was just fear I was able to hold it I just held fear there and just kept driving I got to work A coworker greeted me and said How are you doing I said well I m experiencing terror right now but otherwise I m fine And it was true In that moment I didn t have to believe the terror t was possible to feel all the physiological reactions and all of the contraction in the mind and say ok this is just fear SUZANNE So eventually it falls away Eventually we re going to be able to get back to this ideal steady state that we call inner peace What is inner peace ERIC Inner peace is an absence of inner conflict It s an absence of anxiety It s a quality of confidence of calm of a kind of happiness and a feeling of simplicity It s nice actually inner peace SUZANNE How do you help people through meditation to develop confidence and calm ERIC It s basically what we do in our spiritual practice to develop two qualities an open heart and a clear mind An open heart basically a heart full of love is a heart full of acceptance It s willing to turn toward things without resistance You can see how that would be an antedote anxiety or to fear which is a resistance in the heart A clear mind is simply seeing things for what they are For example I know absolutely that I will die that death is certain and that the time of my death is uncertain If I come to accept that fact through the clarity of mind of simply seeing this is a truth the fear of death begins to fall away I begin simply to not be that concerned about dying So open heart clear mind SUZANNE Let s start with open heart What s a technique or a strategy that we can use to develop that ERIC There s an actual meditation practice for developing lovingkindness When we talk about lovingkindness in this culture our concept of love is pretty devalued This is not about Hallmark it s not about sentimentality It s really about a great power Mohandas Gandhi said if just one person developed love the highest form of

    Original URL path: http://www.goodradioshows.org/peaceTalksL06.htm (2016-02-13)
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  • Good Radio Shows: 2010 Episodes

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    Original URL path: /peaceTalksL85.htm (2016-02-13)


  • Ralph Bunche-Profile in Peace
    they got back home if they d given away too much He could get all that working with the objections they had made to some previous proposal and he could reformulate that proposal in a way that would give everybody just enough leeway to get through It s something that very few people can do To do it you have to have first of all an enormously acute analytical mind and secondly a very great capacity for understanding the difficulties of other people Ralph Bunche Sir Brian Urquhart INGLES What you re talking about is a capacity for empathy URQUHART Absolutely One of the generals whom Ralph employed in the Middle East once said that Ralph had the kindest eyes that he d ever seen I think it was true He was a person who really had an unusual appreciation and liking for his fellow human beings Curiously enough it is not necessarily a very common quality He really cared about the whole idea of helping people in trouble Those are the people he was interested in He was surprisingly little interested in very important people celebrities that kind of thing He didn t mind about them at all He was deeply interested in the lives of ordinary people and how he could improve them That gave him a very great motivation for getting on with these extremely difficult subjects INGLES Did he also have a skill for being present and I assume an extraordinary skill for listening URQUHART He was an incredibly good listener In fact I think it was Moshe Dayan who was at that time an up and coming general in the Israeli Army who once described during the Armistice Agreements that Bunch would sit there for hours just looking at the person who was speaking absolutely unmoving and you could somehow see this knowledge being received into some central area of his brain and being filed accurately so that he could pull it out later on INGLES Ralph Bunche Jr what do you think was at the core of his conflict resolution philosophy which made him successful Ralph Bunche Jr He was a tireless worker As a family we didn t see him very much He was a good father but he wasn t home a lot He was an excellent listener on both sides to a conflict He knew how to relax people with humor Only after studying about it thinking about it for quite some time was he able to find compromises that seemed to appeal to both parties He d never believe that fighting it out was a solution He started out with a bias against armed conflict Through humor and long hours he was able to assure the parties that they were going to get the semblance of a fair shake on both sides of it INGLES How do you recall him communicating the message of nonviolence tolerance and conflict resolution to you and your sisters Was there something conscious that you

    Original URL path: http://www.goodradioshows.org/peaceTalksL45.html (2016-02-13)
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