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  • Runrunrun. – Heart-Strutter.org
    Line The Nife En L Air The Simply Luxurious Life To Universe with Love Friends Elizabeth Heather Jared Ketta Lorik Soo Soo Misc Reads Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal Runrunrun I perhaps need to be putting on my workout attire but I momentarily felt an inclination to write I ve been thinking a lot about what makes me happy lately And what makes me feel complete I wish I could say I ve figured it all out and that I m a new person But really I m the same person I haven t figured much out at all but maybe my phrasing is a little bit different Or maybe I am just all the same and I can now see more shades of which the world is composed What has been bothering me is my sleep Something is wrong from the moment I fall asleep to the moment I wake up and I cannot pinpoint it or explain it To be at such a loss for words is disturbing especially when it has to do with my physiological processes It s not that the days are blurring together it s that every day feels like the one before it No that doesn t quite explain it It s like I close my eyes for a second and I ve arrived at the next day without any knowledge of time My internal time clock seems broken I never feel fully tired or fully rested I m lulled in this state of No this doesn t explain it either Ugh It s hard to analyze sleep because I am not completely conscious of what happens during I m basing this strange feeling on the moments just before and just after And like the name implies they last just as long momentarily Then I have to wait until the next day to see if this feeling resurfaces and it does Anyway I ve been thinking about what course of action I need to take to gain happiness Because this is not it Lately I have successfully managed to shut down my emotional receptors This is what I ve always wanted But underlying my dgaf attitude is this knowing feeling that something isn t right As much as I dgaf my current situation is not ideal Can I manage to relinquish my stability without fear in the hopes of attaining something far more dear to me I m obviously talking about work The more I am there and the longer I am there something inside me begins to hurt Right now I go through the motions perfectly But my awareness of me being there is diminishing so that I may continue to get my work done without emotionally feeling that my current job makes me sick to my stomach I would say this technique is akin to taking anti inflammatory pain reliever meds This technique I ve begun to use subconsciously These types of pain relievers work by getting

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/07/25641/runrunrun/ (2016-04-26)
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  • Not One and The Same. – Heart-Strutter.org
    26 27 28 29 30 Culinary Local Milk Oh My Veggies Oh She Glows The Chalkboard Two Peas Their Pod Fashion Style Camellia Fiber Co Capture the Castle Cognitive Buyers Fried Rice Connoisseur Note To Self The Epitome of Quiet The Line The Nife En L Air The Simply Luxurious Life To Universe with Love Friends Elizabeth Heather Jared Ketta Lorik Soo Soo Misc Reads Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal Not One and The Same My calendar is so packed this month and next month I feel fatigue just thinking about it Right now trying to plan my fitness schedule in a concrete way is draining I feel pre lazy But once it s on my schedule I follow through 100 So it s easier for me to permanently ink in my plans My predominant feeling these days is tired Just plain tired Not fully exhausted not fully drained just a little bit on the tired side I ve been non stop every day Back to back plans for days and days I hardly sleep on the weekends And the weekdays are even more busy and the hours more limited and chance to recoup sleep slim I m no longer unhappy but I m not happy either It would take too many words too many emotions just plain more than I have to explain But interestingly I found this post in my archives and it makes me so incredibly angry because I know it reminds me of him Some quotes of interest to me this evening Although I feel that my tragedy is the greatest in history greater than the fall of empires I am nevertheless aware of my total insignificance I am absolutely persuaded that I am nothing in this universe yet I feel that

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/09/25645/not-one-and-the-same/ (2016-04-26)
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  • Spring Breeze – Heart-Strutter.org
    Favorite Movies Favorite Quotes Movies Night Diving Ryan s 101 goals in 1001 days Search for Subscribe to Blog via Email Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email Email Address Random Posts Shopping January Round Up Pour The Champagne Let the Darkness Swallow You Whole Make a sound fake it enough Waiting Game June 2014 S M T W T F S May Jul 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 Culinary Local Milk Oh My Veggies Oh She Glows The Chalkboard Two Peas Their Pod Fashion Style Camellia Fiber Co Capture the Castle Cognitive Buyers Fried Rice Connoisseur Note To Self The Epitome of Quiet The Line The Nife En L Air The Simply Luxurious Life To Universe with Love Friends Elizabeth Heather Jared Ketta Lorik Soo Soo Misc Reads Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal Spring Breeze It s actually fairly gloomy today and I m wearing three layers in the office There s the inevitable tank top the Everlane long sleeve u neck sweater and then a windbreaker jacket on top with the name of my boss boat on it I m eating this refreshing Chia Pod oats with chunks of apple coconut oil and spices Since I ve been reduced to oats for breakfast for most of my living days might as well make it a little different even if really it s all just the same Chia Pod Oats and my own home made Oatmeal muffins with a variety of fruit and toppings Despite the cooler temperatures as of late a far departure from the 80 85 degree heat

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/11/25657/spring-breeze/ (2016-04-26)
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  • Week in Review 001 – Heart-Strutter.org
    Favorite Quotes Movies Night Diving Ryan s 101 goals in 1001 days Search for Subscribe to Blog via Email Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email Email Address Random Posts 5 Piece Wardrobe Quick Quick Living beautifully Protected Stay With Me Tonight The New Hampshire Debate June 2014 S M T W T F S May Jul 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 Culinary Local Milk Oh My Veggies Oh She Glows The Chalkboard Two Peas Their Pod Fashion Style Camellia Fiber Co Capture the Castle Cognitive Buyers Fried Rice Connoisseur Note To Self The Epitome of Quiet The Line The Nife En L Air The Simply Luxurious Life To Universe with Love Friends Elizabeth Heather Jared Ketta Lorik Soo Soo Misc Reads Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal Week in Review 001 I keep meaning to make this a regular weekly type post in an aesthetically pleasing way but alas I have not set aside any time to open up any photo editing software Just to capture some of my favorite things throughout the week Current Reads for pleasure The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern for book club If on a winter s night a traveller by Italo Calvino translated by William Weaver The Watchlist Game of Thrones HBO Penny Dreadful Showtime Sherlock s 3 Netflix Editorials of Note article The Slow Fashion Movement reversing environmental damage blog post knuckle down on fashion and working hard But most people I think need a jolt every now and then to remember that the world doesn t owe them anything article Faking Cultural Literacy

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/13/25662/week-in-review-001/ (2016-04-26)
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  • The Tomb – Heart-Strutter.org
    The Simply Luxurious Life To Universe with Love Friends Elizabeth Heather Jared Ketta Lorik Soo Soo Misc Reads Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal The Tomb The Tomb By Thomas Stanley 1625 1678 WHEN cruel fair one I am slain By thy disdain And as a trophy of thy scorn To some old tomb am borne Thy fetters must their power bequeath To those of Death Nor can thy flame immortal burn Like monumental fires within an urn Thus freed from thy proud empire I shall prove There is more liberty in Death than Love And when forsaken lovers come To see my tomb Take heed thou mix not with the crowd And as a victor proud To view the spoils thy beauty made Press near my shade Lest thy too cruel breath or name Should fan my ashes back into a flame And thou devour d by this revengeful fire His sacrifice who died as thine expire Or should my dust thy pity move That could not love Thy sighs might wake me and thy tears Renew my life and years Or should thy proud insulting scorn Laugh at my urn Kindly deceiv d by thy disdain I might be smil d into new life again Then come not near since both thy love and hate Have equal power to kill or animate But if cold earth or marble must Conceal my dust Whilst hid in some dark ruins I Dumb and forgotten lie The pride of all thy victory Will sleep with me And they who should attest thy glory Will or forget or not believe this story Then to increase thy triumph let me rest Since by thine eye slain buried in thy breast The line liberty in death was just vaguely mentioned in

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/14/25664/the-tomb/ (2016-04-26)
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  • Ode to a Nightingale – Heart-Strutter.org
    Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal Ode to a Nightingale Ode to a Nightingale BY JOHN KEATS My heart aches and a drowsy numbness pains My sense as though of hemlock I had drunk Or emptied some dull opiate to the drains One minute past and Lethe wards had sunk Tis not through envy of thy happy lot But being too happy in thine happiness That thou light winged Dryad of the trees In some melodious plot Of beechen green and shadows numberless Singest of summer in full throated ease O for a draught of vintage that hath been Cool d a long age in the deep delved earth Tasting of Flora and the country green Dance and Provençal song and sunburnt mirth O for a beaker full of the warm South Full of the true the blushful Hippocrene With beaded bubbles winking at the brim And purple stained mouth That I might drink and leave the world unseen And with thee fade away into the forest dim Fade far away dissolve and quite forget What thou among the leaves hast never known The weariness the fever and the fret Here where men sit and hear each other groan Where palsy shakes a few sad last gray hairs Where youth grows pale and spectre thin and dies Where but to think is to be full of sorrow And leaden eyed despairs Where Beauty cannot keep her lustrous eyes Or new Love pine at them beyond to morrow Away away for I will fly to thee Not charioted by Bacchus and his pards But on the viewless wings of Poesy Though the dull brain perplexes and retards Already with thee tender is the night And haply the Queen Moon is on her throne Cluster d around by all her starry Fays But here there is no light Save what from heaven is with the breezes blown Through verdurous glooms and winding mossy ways I cannot see what flowers are at my feet Nor what soft incense hangs upon the boughs But in embalmed darkness guess each sweet Wherewith the seasonable month endows The grass the thicket and the fruit tree wild White hawthorn and the pastoral eglantine Fast fading violets cover d up in leaves And mid May s eldest child The coming musk rose full of dewy wine The murmurous haunt of flies on summer eves Darkling I listen and for many a time I have been half in love with easeful Death Call d him soft names in many a mused rhyme To take into the air my quiet breath Now more than ever seems it rich to die To cease upon the midnight with no pain While thou art pouring forth thy soul abroad In such an ecstasy Still wouldst thou sing and I have ears in vain To thy high requiem become a sod Thou wast not born for death immortal Bird No hungry generations tread thee down The voice I hear this passing

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/14/25667/ode-to-a-nightingale/ (2016-04-26)
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  • Rebound. – Heart-Strutter.org
    Jared Ketta Lorik Soo Soo Misc Reads Cereal Magazine Matador Network The Believer Logger Undone Journal Rebound I think I discovered what was going on with my sleep for the last three or so weeks REM Rebound Every time I fell asleep I would wake up suddenly at 4am and it would feel as though I literally had just barely closed my eyes but due to the passage of time knew for certain I had slept Yet I didn t feel rested I would dream too vividly to feel as though I had gotten any rest whatsoever So then I would proceed to attempt sleep again and then awaken just past 5 and late to work every single day People experience REM Rebounding when they lose even as little as an hour of sleep a night The body then prioritizes REM sleep over the non REM cycles of sleep meaning dreaming instantly from the moment you fall asleep These past few days I ve been taking cursory glances at different sources regarding the importance of sleep the sleep phases and so on It s all really fascinating stuff but little of it is concrete mostly theoretical But I fixed my sleep dilemma for now There s an app for that I stopped using my sleep app some time in April but resumed again during the latter part of this week so that I should be awoken via an alarm during the phase of sleep closest to waking This has made me feel a bit more rested though not entirely I ve really been neglecting my body for a few weeks little exercise just 1 2 times a week eating a lot of birthday cake and beer and staying out late It s no wonder my sleep quality suffered The Internet

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/15/25673/rebound/ (2016-04-26)
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  • The Breakfast Hacks – Heart-Strutter.org
    I proceeded to look up nutritional information regarding optimal breakfast choices My google query should you eat protein or carbs for breakfast I was trying to justify eating what I ate Literally 10 tabs 20 minutes and a lined notepaper full of notes later I have arrived at the self same conclusion I m stuck with oatmeal for breakfast for the rest of my living days I think I m secretly trying to find a way to avoid eating oatmeal Alas not today But fck it because my breakfast was salmon protein omega 3 and 6 healthy fat cooked in olive oil good healthy fat and a hard boiled egg sans the yolk protein sans the fat only 43 of the protein of an egg comes from the yolk so I see it as dispensable Most of the calories of an egg come from the yolk as well VERY dispensable And 99 of the fat of an egg comes from the yolk dispensable if and only if I am consuming an alternative and healthier fat HOWEVER most of the vitamins nutrients are in the YOLK but I presume to consume those throughout the day in other foods so still dispensable and a baby sized granny smith apple carb low glycemic index fruit sugar intake There are three types of carbs starch sugar fiber from there each of these three types can be complex or simple to signify the rate at which the body converts these to energy how quickly they are digested From there complex and simple carbs can be refined or unrefined I frequently prefer lunch esque meals for breakfast mostly because by the time I m breaking my fast a great deal many hours have passed about 12 13 potentially but not always so I am ravenous PLUS

    Original URL path: http://heart-strutter.org/2014/06/16/25675/the-breakfast-hacks/ (2016-04-26)
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